Monday, June 4, 2012

What are words for . . . ?

I'm not sure if this is necessarily an ADD issue, an aging issue, or just an "I'm insane" issue, but lately the words coming out of my mouth aren't fitting the thoughts in my brain.  For instance, when trying to tell my daughter that in her next ballet class she might have to wear footless tights and spaghetti strap leotards.  (I've seen the older girls in these outfits so I'm not making this up.)   What I said was "legless tights" and "strapless leotards."  Legless tights is an oxymoron.  Now my 8-year-old walks around laughing at me and strikes me down with just the utterance, "legless tights."  I am providing mockery fodder for my children way too soon.

On the other hand, words escape me.  I can't think of the word I'm trying to say in the middle of a sentence in the middle of a story.  I resort to pantomime.  Just a minute ago, I laughed at a cartoon my 5-year-old son was watching and he wanted to know why I thought it was funny.  I answered, "Because, because, because . . . " searching, brain searching.  I pantomimed with my hands "big" and "fluffy." My son answered, "The pillow?"  "Yes, and because it went, pfft!"  That was my answer, hand gestures and sound effects.  Hi, I'm a graduate student . . . in WRITING!  And no, I haven't suffered from a stroke or brain injury.

What I was trying to say, by the way, was, "It's funny because the air bag inflated."  He's too young to mock that and my daughter just left for camp, so I'm safe from mockery . . . for now.